COVID F**KING 19! …AND 20 …AND 21
Apparently, I should address this long ago, for my ( 3 remaining ) English readers, I am sorry to keep you waiting.
Looking back to when I posted last, I’ve even more so demotivated to write a single word.
But the show must go on.
Let’s see, where were we?
Right, we were talking about books, and then a plague happened. Well, it’s still happening. I have just received quite unsettling news that China is going to close its borders for another year. By the time I can go visit any friends anywhere, half a decade would go by. Like, NOT OKAY:(
Apart from not able to travel abroad, I wouldn’t say my life is all a mess. Sure people are dating, getting engaged and married and pregnant and second baby, and I’m doing NONE of that, but I’ve been fortunate enough to travel to every city in China, and oh how grand is my country!
From the hottest island in February( got a sunburn on the first day there, awesome! ) to take in the freshest air in the very northeast of China in summer. From Plum rain season in Hangzhou to the Panda land of Chengdu on the West coast (we actually don’t have coast in the West, but let’s just say there is ).
I’ve watched more sunsets on the plane than I ever did on the ground and it’s beyond beautiful when it’s up this close and personal.
Of course, it’s not always a bed of roses, if there’s one thing that I miss the most is the routine, the sense of belonging, and an order of life.
In the first two months of COVID when China went to lockdown, I finally got the time I need to paint the wall and install the side table, and decorated my apartment. I loved my avocado toast with a fried egg and chili flakes and making a pot of coffee has never felt this satisfactory. I had more than 20 big plants and finally hang the paintings on the wall. At night I would paint and write.
Maybe it sounds boring to you guys but I miss that time, I miss the quietness and stillness. Yet we are connected more than ever! I think that was the ideal balance I want for work and life- stay alone, minding my own business but connecting to my people whenever needed.
Fast forward to now, I have to give up that apartment since I am barely there. It’s kind of sad, I did spend all these lovely lonely times in that place, checking in with my heart and my soul. On the other hand, not to brag or anything but I really brought the place to life, the agent showed the first viewer my apartment and it was a done deal! I mean who wouldn’t love it!
Sorry to talk so much about the amazing job I have done to my apartment, haha, have I bore you already?
But it was through this process that I came through so much about relationships, any type of relationship. You have to really track the metaphor right now okay? Here goes, try to catch up:
The apartment and I first met on a cold November afternoon, but the light in the house brought up the whole place and made it look like it’s not a cold winter day at all. (Love at first sight)
And then I worked hard to get to the point where the apartment is amazing and I felt cozy. (Honeymoon)
Life happens and one of us has to go, a hard decision to make but we made it nonetheless, because deep down you know it’s better for both sides. (Conflict)
You are happy to see the apartment in good hands because unconditional love is that you are happy for what makes him/her/it happy right? (Growth)
The End!
Ha, Kidding!
Anywayyyy, I think what we all need now is patience, which is something I learned through life lessons.
Here I’m going to talk about something very personal and I never talked about it before. But don’t worry, it’s a happy thing!
I never have a problem talking about my period because it’s not taboo and we should be able to talk about it whenever we want, at least that’s how I was brought up.
We had sex ed in elementary school and I finally got my first period in the 11th grade, yes, in high school. I remember at some point my mother wanted to take me to the hospital just to make sure everything is fine, I, of course, refused to go and told her that everything is fine and she should just be patient. I was the only girl who graduated middle school without hitting puberty, just purely growing the height. And when I finally got it, my mother told my old school, and everyone congratulated her.
So if anything I learned from that experience, is, be patient, with yourself, and with life.
We have an idiom in Chinese “好事多磨” which means “ good things never come easy ” or “good things take time .”
Good things never come easy, and love is the best of all things, think about that.
Be patient my darlings!
But still, fuck COVID!
Words by me, photos by me, and Marsh.
Dress: Cecilie bahnsen
Shoes: Golden Goose